I persist.

Merry Christmas everybody, I’m still here. To anyone who has been waiting for updates I promise to they are on there way, I’ve had quite the month and have been meaning to write just that I haven’t found the time. 
-Misanthropist

Evil has landed.

Queens of the Stone Age.

Evil has landed

The Parson’s Green terror attack.

As you’re no doubt aware London has been subjected to another terrorist attack, an explosive device placed by the doors of a train during a busy period. The attack would have been quite effective had everything gone to plan, which thankfully it did not. The device used was quite primitive and I believe it ended up detonating earlier than intended. I’m also surprised that nobody was killed in the ensuing panic. 

We only have to look at the blitz in London to know how deadly a human stampede can be in an underground station. The metropolitan police quickly apprehended the suspect. The bomb itself only injured people leaving a few with burns which is better than the alternative. The device was contained inside a bucket stored within a Lidl bag which it barely managed to destroy.

A Reddit user was quoted saying 

Marvel at the durability of Lidl plastic bags which are powerful enough to withstand the explosion of a bomb. German engineering.

As usual the English are already making jokes about the situation. Even I must admit this is like the worst terrorist attack ever which is actually a good thing. I think many Londoners share this sentiment. We’re bored of this shit now. I wouldn’t say it’s become a norm but it is definitely something we have come to expect every once in a while. A sad reality and result of conflicts in the Middle East. 

On the other side I’ve seen pictures of London mayor Siddique Khan holding a Lidl bag on the tube with a caption ‘we know who really did it.’ On one side I’m actually happy with our response to the attacks against our city and on the other I’m disappointed by things like that. That doesn’t seem to represent a majority of us but still a fairly significant portion. 

On the terror attacks and being sick of them, I often hear of some incident and turn check the BBC with a reaction something like the image below. 

I do understand that solving the issues caused in the Middle East and their repercussions here at home will take decades, the problem isn’t going to just go away. I can only hope we become more effective at preventing these attacks without that leading to further breaches of our rights and privacy by the wicked witch of Westminster.

Looking at the attack itself and the results there’s nowhere near the kind of tension in the air that there was after the previous attacks, back then I could pop a packet of crisps on a bus and people probably would have hit the deck or ran for their lives. This attack is mediocre in comparison. I doubt ISIS will even want to claim responsibility for these. Sometimes the way they operate reminds me of franchise restaurants, like the Subway of terrorism. 

Another concerning phenomena is the use of acid to attack people, it seems to have grown far more widespread suddenly. In a rare and useful move the government is pushing for harsher laws for those who attack others with acid and I believe considering a database/licensing for the purchase of acid, a move which to me seems quite reasonable. 

Shooting someone, stabbing someone or beating someone sure I can understand. These are pretty par of the course but to throw acid at someone implies a special kind of hatred or callousness. You don’t kill them but essentially ruin their entire lives even if they’re not blinded by it. Those people deserve life sentences. Speaking of stabbing the number of knife related incidents seem to have gone up as well as racially related attacks.

You get those moments where you think the world has gone mad, where you’d rather not turn on the news because all you’ll hear is depressing shit from home or some other part of the world that their is nothing in you can do about. I don’t tend to ignore these things even if they are uncomfortable because I like to stay informed but I can understand people who do. 

It’s a relief that this guy was such a shit terrorist his device could barely destroy a Lidl bag or we would need body bags right now.

-Misanthropist.

Rick and Morty, people and Fandom.

So many years ago someone I knew posted a cover photo on shitbook, an animated picture of a garage open in the moonlight. I knew it was from a show but I’m not one for watching television to be honest. I started looking at Reddit again out of boredom a while back and through Reddit became aware of Rick and Morty. Reddit being Reddit I assumed this was another circle-jerk, which to be accurate, it was. 

That put me off of watching it for a long while, Reddit has a tendency to circle-jerk over things that aren’t that funny so I basically couldn’t be bothered. Eventually a friend showed me a few clips during a Friday night, the next night I ended up watching some myself. Two weeks later I found myself bored so I decided to watch a few episodes one night.

A few episodes turned into three quarters of season one, I finished the last quarter a day later. Onto season two which I watched in one night, ending up awake until around 4am. A week ago I got to season 3 episode 4 and in a way I’m glad I haven’t been watching the show the whole time because I haven’t waited for a new season until the current one is over. 

The only thing I dislike about Rick and Morty is the pseudointelectuals within the fan base, other than that it’s a very enjoyable show. This lukewarm helping of copypasta will demonstrate the kind of pseudointellectual shit I’m talking about:

The other thing that gets me is fan theories, I understand taking an educated guess at what might happen but developing entire theories around characters, who has that kind of time? I’d rather spend it doing something useful. 

Game of thrones fans are definitely the worst so far, I’m not slating the show at all because I’ve enjoyed much of what I’ve seen. Honestly I just don’t have the staying power to sit and watch it, even if I don’t watch it there will be someone who will tell me about it either from the show or having read the books so I’m pretty caught up. I’m also aware that fans of the series really hate spoilers and will react angrily when exposed to them.

That’s another thing I don’t get, being super pissed off by spoilers… If someone is constantly spoiling it I can understand you would be irritated but still it’s funny how emotional people get over spoilers. I can hear spoilers or even read and still appreciate the execution of the scene. Each to their own I guess? I’m still not really one for watching shows but I’ve found something to pass time when I’m bored now. 

Fan bases can be crazy. I cringe when I see something like a Rick and Morty tattoo, wearing merchandise or a stranger referencing it in hopes to get a laugh. The same way I cringe when I hear or see memes used IRL. I really enjoy the show myself but the boner Reddit has for Rick and Morty is colossal.  

Speaking of fandom it’s ridiculous nowadays the people who have fans. YouTube personalities get fans and merch now. Then again a judge from a reality TV show can become president of the United States so… 

Personally I hope the wait for the new season isn’t too long because it’s almost the end of the season. I’ve had archer suggested to me by a friend, another show the jerk is strong for. Bob’s burgers I’m not really sure about, saying that, I’ve never even watched more than a short clip or two and that failed to hook me in the way Rick and Morty did. I may end up giving it another chance at some point if I am bored and desperate enough. 

I’m not sure if anyone here has heard of Ugly Americans? My ex girlfriend introduced me to it and we watched season one and I think season 2 but they never renewed it for whatever reason. I enjoyed passing time watching that. I hope they do renew it one day but I highly doubt it, which is a shame really. 

For the first time in many years I’ve actually sat down and watched a show, which makes me hope it doesn’t fall into the same traps as many other well known animated comedy has. It’s a little early to say but for now we can only hope. 

-Misanthropist.

Guerilla job hunting

I’ve become tired of traditional job hunting methods. You apply for the job, someone receives the application on the other end and may or may not bother to read it. Larger companies will even use software to look for keywords within a CV and if you don’t match the software will automatically throw your application out. A perfect candidate for this position may not have enough of the keywords within their application meaning it gets thrown out, software isn’t exactly a great judge of suitability for a position.

I’ve resorted to a different method of application which to some may seem backward as the employer receives the CV post-contact but so far it has left employers impressed or slightly off guard. This method serves a few purposes, the first of which is to show initiative, the second of which is to gauge the employers actual interest in you as a candidate. Tonality, language used and other factors make a person’s intentions clear in a way that isn’t accurately conveyed in an email communication. 

The second is that with this method your CV is requested by the employer themselves and not just sent to them, you are no longer just a name on a piece of paper. If the employer asks for a cv it also means that you can ask for a specific internal email address to send it to, this way it skips any employment agency or third party that the employer may have to pay for the pleasure of receiving you as a candidate. Not only are you making yourself known but in some cases you may be saving them money. 

I’ve come to notice that on some of the jobsites I’ve used they do not list the name of the company or address but rather the location of the business on a mostly unmarked map, the only other information available is the name of the person hiring. I compare the unmarked map to my google maps app in order to find the location of the business. I then do research into the role, company and individual listed on the original advertisement. After this is complete I call the relevant department.

Let’s say this is the sales manager, I will call the main line and select the relevant department. Once I’m on the phone with a sales agent I then identify myself but not the purpose of my call. I allow the sales agent to assume I’m a customer then ask to be transferred to their manager. Believing I am a potential or existing customer they usually oblige, then I am transferred to their manager after which I make clear the reason for my call.

If my time in sales and telemarketing has taught me anything it’s this: You have about 30 seconds or so to interest the person on the other end of the line. That’s where you sell yourself, because this is targeted you already know exactly what the manager is looking for so it’s like fitting two pieces of a puzzle. I’m usually asked how I got this number etc after which I explain how I used their advertisement to find them specifically. Some are impressed by the initiative some are disconcerted by it. Either way I’ve been asked for my CV every single time.

I’ve even done this with jobs where I know somebody has left or quit, sometimes a week or more before an advertisement is even posted (cue twilight zone theme). That’s the main one that disconcerts them. I use the opener ‘I recently become aware of an opening within your organisation’ luckily for me at this point they’re too weirded out to even ask how I became a privy to this information. I can’t help thinking I may have overreached in a way…

I’ll know when I’m suddenly inundated by multiple offers at once, if I look at it in a positive light my efforts may afford me the luxury of choice. I recognise this method is not for everyone but I’m basically making use of telemarketing techniques from my sales career and investigative techniques I learned. The combination of these skill sets has provided me with a greater response rate than traditional methods of application. 

I’m currently considering whether targeted emails could be a viable tactic. Again advertising myself as a candidate whilst skipping the usual CV pile. Showcase myself and my skills then wait until I get a bite. The only thing being that this would be quite time consuming as each would have to be personalised but that isn’t a far cry from your usual job hunt. I don’t really see the point of going through the usual channels, dealing with recruitment agents of having my cv and cover letter sit in an inbox until the person hiring can be bothered to read them.

90% of the time the staff I came into contact with just assumed I’m a customer who has a problem with an order or product. Assumption is my friend in this case. 

I’m surprised by the lack of negative reaction to these tactics and just like in my old sales positions, if you get a rejection it doesn’t matter really. Just make sure you’re 100% focused and you’ve pre-planned responses to their questions, kind of like objection handling in sales, so you don’t end up like (see below) on the other end of the phone.

You really cannot afford to hesitate during these calls, remain calm and relaxed at all times. Most importantly have an answer for everything because this is basically the job hunting version of cold calling. 

I’ve never had these ideas suggested to me by anybody, mainly I was just bored with normal job hunting techniques and got a little bit creative. In a way I feel like my time in marketing wasn’t entirely wasted and I’m waiting to see the fruits of my labour. It has definitely increased my response rate. 

-Misanthropist.

Universal Fuck ups

Fuck ups, across the board.

So being unemployed I applied for unemployment, as you do, which means I get to deal with my favourite people the JSA or their shitty convergence of existing services rebranded as Universal Credit. I avoided applying for as long as possible because I didn’t want to deal with them, when I did reapply I told them my reasoning for doing so and I informed them of my earnings. All above board and generally known as doing the right thing.

Lo and behold they manage to somehow fuck it up. They paid me the correct amount with deductions the first time, my second payment was the same amount. They had deducted my earnings not once but twice, all the while my advisor is telling me this is correct. Not sure if stupid or just not understanding? I think Hanlon’s razor applies here. So I call them to get it fixed and they say they will notify me when it has gone through, now they’ve made mistake three times. The wrong amount paid again. 

They also failed to notify me of it as they said they would. During my third phone call a rather confused representative I was talking to figured out that they owed me a whole months payment from previously, the time before I’d applied. Now this is all wonderful but in the time waiting for them to make three mistakes and fix them I’d run into debt so the money I had received went mostly to paying that off. I was back at 0 but that’s better than minus.

Now for me this is inconvenient but for someone who has children to feed, a mortgage or otherwise this could be a disaster. If anything I’m thankful that the confused lady on the phone listened and took time to look into my problem. I had to explain it many times but the result was definitely worth the effort. This convergence of services was supposed to make the process more efficient. That obviously failed in its objective. 

If anything it may speed up people’s journey into employment as they’ll get tired of the incompetence. I know I am, I’m already exploring the possibility of generating my own employment because universal credit and the local area has very little to offer right now. I’m basically tired of this shit. They can fuck things up multiple times without repercussions but god forbid I make a single mistake. 

-Misanthropist 

Gravity’s kiss

Well a lot has happened since I last updated and what goes up must, inevitably, come down. So here I am. I was quite happy where I was until things went tits up, I think I’ll begin with the job as it seems like a great way to start. Let’s just say I’m not working there anymore on principal. You don’t pay me I don’t work, I think I was fair and patient with my employer. I just have one question: How stupid are you if you attempt to screw over the guy that earns your business money, trains the newbies, deals with admin and IT?

The answer to that is: A couple grand short. It was a simple thing really, I work and you pay me. I was lead to believe employment had worked like that for a while now. To be honest the employers loss of money and reputation wasn’t worth the silly amount of money she refused to pay me (half of my wages) now she has lost more than triple that amount in clients and I’ve called my old co-workers in the same industry and informed them of the situation so nobody with any useful experience will work for her.

Other than that I’ve locked my computer and all files are encrypted so it’ll take her a while to recover that information. I also uncovered some illegal activity that would likely have my ex employer sent down for fraud. Beyond that I could call her place of worship and inform them of a few big no-no’s which would likely lead to her religion’s version of being excommunicated. I haven’t done these last two because despite my anger at her I am not a sociopath. Crippling her business is enough. 

Other than that I took two parting gifts. The list of our business partners and the administrative passwords for all business accounts except the banking information. I don’t want to touch that with a barge pole. That’s the thing when you let people assume you are benign, they feel safe. They don’t realise you’re watching, listening and putting the pieces together. Doesn’t help when your OPSEC is like wet cardboard. All going well I will go into business with those partners I previously spoke of because in this particular industry I have a reputation.

If I’m feeling particularly malicious I may inform those partners that my boss has been very dishonest and effectively destroy their business relationship. Until then I’m looking to make some fast money, nothing illegal but just enough to get by. This particular even and a few more are the reasons I haven’t posted here in many months, then again by now any regular reader is probably used to this behaviour, something I have apologised for on many occasions now.

Back to my employer for a moment, if she thought I was stupid and that I trusted her for a second then she underestimated me greatly. Her mistake. This is business and you don’t get anything for free, if you try to screw a partner then you deal with the consequences of such actions. If anything losing thousands is getting off lightly.

Some of you may be wondering if doing something like I have done will get me blacklisted in some way, it won’t. The simple reason for this is she has committed a crime. If she blacklists me in any way I will blacklist her life and I’ve made it abdundantly clear to my her.

I’d continue from here but I think each of these events warrants a separate post…

-Misanthropist 

She comes around again.

A while back I was writing about the women in my life. I accepted whatever loses occurred as it’s part of meeting people. I’ve played the game enough to know there are always fall outs. It’s part of life and while I may miss them as people I’m not going be upset about it. What I did not expect however was one to come back. 

I say that but I ended the post ‘A minus’ by saying that I’d hear from her again, maybe I partly knew this would happen. I’m guessing it didn’t work out why that guy she was seeing. I’m not really a fan of hot and cold, generally I stay warm. That chemistry I was unsure of is right back, this is why I kick myself for not trusting my gut at times.

We’ve spoken for the last few days and it’s nice to hear from her. She definitely wants something. I know what it is. She’s only half shy about it. I’ve been nice, I haven’t thrown her suddenly reappearance in her face. It is kinda funny to me that now she wants to know. This isn’t the first time with her, she goes away and comes back. 

Always comes back. I had thought last time was the last time. I entertain her because I like her as a person, I mean yeah we could fuck but I don’t have to. She’s good company clothed or not. Just because you can doesn’t mean you should. Men often complain that women don’t make their intentions clear, this is not the case with her.

She ended up asking me to go out, I discovered that we have very similar tastes in food which makes things smoother. One thing I do like about her is she’s not hard to please. We’ll have a nice night whatever we end up doing. I will go out with her as a friend and see what kind of night we have. As I see it there’s a reason she keeps coming back. I see no harm in spending some time with her.

-Misanthropist.

Sunday: Steak, budgeting and a lack of hot water.

As you’re no doubt aware if you’ve been reading this blog longer than 10 minutes, I dislike Sundays. For me they’re little more than a waiting room for the transit between the weekend and work. Today I’m not doing much, as is usual for a Sunday. 

My only real task today is cooking steak, a labour of love. I’m having a steak and cheese baguette for dinner. Other than that I have trousers, shirts, ties etc to launder and iron. I’ve sat down and budgeted, I should be left with a nice figure at the end of the month even after I’ve purchased everything I need.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: if I keep hitting such figures I’m going to require an accountant. Now I can’t wait until my actual paydays. It’s nice knowing where all my money is going and what will be left but I have yet to receive it. It’s the final week before payday and I’m just waiting.

Other than that I’m cleaning my space. I gave in and purchased a fan which I’m not sure was a great investment because of the temperamental nature of English weather. Last night it felt like money well spent. The worst part of today is the fact I don’t have hot water.

It being summer you wouldn’t think that a problem but the cold is ice cold, colder than my drinking water. Almost impossible to shower under without dancing and making a series of noises to the amusement of everyone else here. Boil the kettle and towel wash it is…

My problem after all this is that there is very little to do here and even less company. Unfortunately I can’t have anyone over right now or I’d invite my favourite woman here for steak, wine and a good time.

I should start preparing the steak.
-Misanthropist.

Haircuts.

I don’t usually write posts about this sort of thing but lately I’ve heard many people I know complain that a hairdresser has messed up and they’ve had to get it corrected, even my close friend had the same issue a  few months back. I’ve never had this problem. I’ve come to conclusion that I am lucky to have had the same hairdresser for 11 or so years now.

She originally worked in a salon that my mother used, eventually that shut down as businesses do and she continued her work alone. For what I’m paying I’m getting amazing value, she sees men’s haircuts as easy and doesn’t charge much for them. The difference between going to herself and a barber is that I can show her three styles and she’ll tell me best fit.

I always end up with a great job and in 11 years I’ve neither had nor heard a complaint about her. For her skill level you’re not paying near as much as in a salon or barber. The only shave I’ve had better was in Brazil with a straight razor. My advice to these people is simple. Find a good hairdresser and stick with them, ask their input instead of simply telling them to do something.

If you do this and your hairdresser is worth their salt you’ll never be disappointed and as a regular customer, like anywhere, there are benefits. If you’re not lucky as I am and don’t have a private hairdresser then I would as a rule say: 

Don’t be afraid to travel and don’t be afraid to pay a little more.

Some things in life can’t be skimped on, your hair is one of them. Sure you may be lucky enough to find a place with great value but there’s some security into going to an establishment where everyone who touches your hair is going to be highly qualified.

I’m not the kind of person to really care about this sort of thing but suddenly, mainly due to work my image has become important. I’ve had to pay more attention to it than I’d like. It seems to pay off because I’ve had a lot of people comment on it. I think I’ve repeated the contents of this post to about four different people this month. 

-Misanthropist.