Archive for job

Here I go again.

Posted in Business, England, Job hunting, London, Love, Unemployment, women, Work with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on January 4, 2017 by MISANTHROPIST

About a week back now I applied for a job but instead of sending your average CV and covering letter I pitched. I started my old job in a sales position and went up from there. Everyone has to start somewhere right?

This summer: he was a salesman but the only thing he couldn’t sell… was himself. 

It’s a shit movie that either stars Rob Schneider or Will Farrell. Anyway, back to the point. So instead of the application I pitched him with ways I could improve and promote his business. I was pretty stoned and drunk if I’m honest and it was a shot in the dark. I never expected a reply.
I didn’t check my email for a number of days afterwards. I woke up one morning to the sound of my phone buzzing. I didn’t answer it right away and received a text shortly afterwards. I answered this message maybe three hours later and received another call. 

I answered this one. We had a short conversation during which I treated him as an equal rather than a potential employer. I asked him questions about his business. Extensive questions really, I wondered if I had been too forward but he was eager to talk to me.

Three days after the application he received my CV and I had a phone call within minutes. It went from a job application to a business meeting in a very short time. We arranged a time and a place. Liverpool Street, London. 

I attended the meeting and we sat down for drinks that he paid for. We discussed his business plan and marketing strategy. He was throughly impressed by my contribution and I now have a job with salary, bonuses and part ownership of the business. A small percentage but it’s a start. 

It’s funny really. I found myself again, like Ouroboros, exactly where I started. Outside dirty dicks in Liverpool Street. Where I had been staying with the Brazilian girl two years ago. I went in for a beer to celerate my success. It felt strange. I half expected her to come out of nowhere.

We walked down these roads together. I saw the ghost of her, the streets we walked and where we shared our first kiss. It was a strange feeling. If  we ever ran into one another again I’m sure it would end in one of two ways: fuck or fight. Still a part of me wanted to see her there.

So here I am, awaiting the paper work. The contract will be signed within a week. The business is vaping by the way. I’m getting part ownership with zero financial risk. I can’t complain about that. I still consider the man my boss as it’s his money and without him I’d still be up shit creek without a paddle.

God today has been weird. I have slept three hours in the last 48 and not eaten a single bite of food in the last 52 hours. Maybe that’s why I miss her suddenly. Maybe it was nostalgia. I don’t really know. Wherever gatinha is I hope she’s happy now. Jesus fuck I’m getting sentimental. 

I’ve never been so sad to be successful. 

-Misanthropist. 

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Hard ball. 

Posted in Job hunting, Work with tags , , , , , , on November 13, 2016 by MISANTHROPIST

I received a phone call last week from an ex colleague. She was telling me about an opportunity in the way that an MLM might pitch to you. Felt sorry seeing me at a jobcentre and such. Obviously I’m skeptical when someone offers me an ‘amazing opportunity.’

It became clear that it wasn’t her opportunity to offer. Another ex colleague had set up his own company, the same industry and she was offering me this opportunity and not the man himself. That’s enough to make you wonder. I got all the basic information out of her.

I proceed to play hard ball with her after she informs me it’s commission only. I’m not about that life. I told her I would accept 1000pm basic with 80% of the commission states but I was willing to go down to 70%. 

Be advised I’m not a complete asshole. I mentioned that if he salaried me I would help in whatever way I could. Admin etc. Also over time whenever required, paid of course. Saying all this it isn’t her call. It’s his. I could contact him myself and he could have contacted me so I’m confident he didn’t make this offer.

I know that she got caught attending a meeting with the other colleague who is fronting the money for the venture that she is attempting to involve me in. She’s currently experiencing disciplinary action as a result. My old company went pretty totalitarian from what she tells me, if indeed she told the truth. 

I take what she says with a grain of salt even if what she said was 70% true, I can’t respect someone like that enough to take them at their word. You’re basically pitching to me… I’m playing hardball. I called you out and you leave me telling me to text you if I’m interested because the decision was never your own.

Sweetening your new employer. I’m not your bargaining chip asshole. If you want me on board you pay me. I don’t do business with people like that. You present yourself as honest, to an idiot you seem honest but I’m not an idiot. He needs to contact me directly if he wants me on board. 

She’s been so loyal to the company, like a dog almost. It served her well at first, she was a manager for a few months. My ex manager also attended the same meeting and wasn’t prepared to bite the hand that fed him and reported back to his employer. He will always have a job with them as he is very involved. 

She’s been thrown out on her ass, suspended. Unfortunately she wasn’t as clever as she believed. Which is funny to me as she’s always underestimated me, honestly it’s adorable.

Knowing is half the battle. 
-Misanthropist.

I never asked for this.

Posted in Job hunting, Work with tags , , , , , , , on August 21, 2016 by MISANTHROPIST

I get in on Friday, fire up my computer, open the spreadsheets, login to our system and after getting my morning out the way I hear a phone call saying you’re going to be speaking with our floor manager. Another colleague comes over and tells me that I’m going to be recruiting on top of all my normal work that day.

‘Floor manager.’ No, you’ve got the wrong guy. I really don’t want to deal with newbies. If they want training sure but I’m not too pleased about the prospect of carrying out primary interviews. I’ve combed for good candidates, some who speak other languages would be an advantage as well as previous experience, advantageous but not entirely necessary.

I’m going to end up heading up a damn team, I know it. I don’t particularly want it and if I’m put into that position, best pay me more. I don’t mind having a team of newbies but the turn over on lower levels is pretty high so I don’t want to waste my time with people who aren’t aware of my expectations or I don’t think will make grade. 

It’s a waste of my time, the company’s money and the applicants time. My main issue thus far is people saying the pay is too low. We need to change demographics to younger job seekers who are looking to earn nicely and learn some skills. I’m going to experiment the coming Monday with only selecting certain age demographics. I could probably get a better result hanging outside the Job Center than using monster.

Honestly, I hate recruitment and I do not want to be responsible for a bunch of fuckbois. I do not want to be the intermediary between candidates and the business. I didn’t ask for this. Is this what work place progression looks like?

-Misanthropist.

Job? Already?

Posted in Unemployment, Work with tags , , , on July 25, 2015 by MISANTHROPIST

I just got word that I may have a job already, I may even start Tuesday. I’ll be help for a stone mason which means a lot of heavy lifting. I could do with the exercise. I feel like I’ve gotten physically weaker and it’d be nice to have some muscle definition again. 

My days will consist of marble, granite and such. Good times. With my redundancy pay I should have a nice sum of money. I can start saving and all my monetary issues will be solved.

Result.

-Misanthropist.

Job is kill…

Posted in Job hunting, Work with tags , , , , , , on January 6, 2014 by MISANTHROPIST

I went into work this Saturday, worked the day as normal but sometime after lunch I overheard a conversation about cuts to hours and somebody getting moved onto the hours that I’d usually do. To me this implies that I will have no hours so I expected it. A few other people’s hours were cut too. Budget cuts they call it. They’ve hired and fired all over the place in the last few months so I’m really not surprised upper management reigned it in eventually. Toward the end of the day I was told by my manager that he needed to talk to me. I basically knew what this ‘talk’ was about. After I’d finished we went for our talk.

He began to talk about our company having budget cuts in 2014 which is when I stopped him and said I’d heard that a colleague was now on my hours so I have no hours. He then explained the arrangement for my last pay. I said I had enjoyed working with him and left. His face was priceless when I cut him off and he was quite shocked by my complete lack of surprise. I then left onto the floor and exclaimed that ‘Master has given Dobby a sock!’
Judging by their reactions at least two already knew what had happened and I got a few immediate laughs before I had to explain to anyone who didn’t get the reference.

Apparently my other manager did and we shared a few good laughs, he said he’d call me if he needed me for any odd days which was a nice gesture but if you had just be release from purgatory would you willingly go back? I had a cigarette with a few people at the end of the day, my final cigarette had a surprising attendance number, I think it was 6 or 7. Half of these people I didn’t even know I was friends with. As you can tell I’m quite happy about not working there anymore, with our current economy I probably shouldn’t be but I’m definitely in a favorable position to enter another job. I’ve got to start hunting again tomorrow, wish me luck.

I’ll miss the workout and some of the people but this change had to come, this just forced it. It’s for the better anyway I wouldn’t want to be trapped there forever. I wasn’t fired, I can give the same excuse he gave me. I can get assistance and I have some decent employment history. Two steps forward and one step back. It hasn’t really phased me at all. I’ve had a great weekend. Some Scotch and relaxation. I’ll be happy to have my weekends back. If I can help it I’m only working Monday to Friday from now on…

So yeah, job is kill and I’ve never been happier.
-Misanthropist.

Things have come to a head.

Posted in Uncategorized, Work with tags , , , , , , , , on November 19, 2013 by MISANTHROPIST

You may or may not remember me mentioning that my branch manager was a dick, well someone from sales isn’t so good at their job and there’s this racial favoritism thing going on so rather than firing him they’ve reduced my hours right on top of Christmas so he can come onto the floor and told me I’m on one day per week, not only that but they had the audacity to ask me to do two extra hours after delivering this news, to which I replied with a prompt ‘no… I can’t work an extra two hours.’ I remember my new supervisor saying ‘you do favors for me and I’ll help you by providing the hours you need.’ Well that bit him in the ass today when I saw that he was doing me no favors whatsoever. They’re also getting rid of newbie and replacing him. Which sucks but I’ve told him that he’s probably better off for leaving the place. To be honest, given the choice I would not have worked there. I’m sick of being affected by the inadequacies of management and senior staff then getting blamed for them. So I have a lot of spare time meaning I’ll be writing a lot more alongside looking for a decent job. Less stress more money and maybe even the chance of a social life? Who knows. I’ll be generally busy finding work but I think I’m going to enjoy this next week or two because I can’t remember the last time I had a life or something resembling that. Needless to say I’m about done working at that place with all its bullshit, idiot co-workers, idiot customers and the like.

I’m done.
Misanthropist.

Et tu newbie?

Posted in Work with tags , , , , , , , , on November 12, 2013 by MISANTHROPIST


Today my newbie came back to work as did his idiot friend, no sign of illness or injury and when I questioned him about it and although I offered him the chance to tell me the truth he did not. It was a particularly slow day which makes the tension in the workplace worse. Newbie also made a few almost fatal errors today sending out wrong parts to a customer which could have cost both the company and the customer thousands. To be honest though that isn’t newbie’s fault. Some idiot thought it would be a good idea to make the numbers very similar. (One digit difference.)

I could have made that mistake when I started, it’s just lucky that the customer recognized something wrong before using it. Anyway, on to newbie’s punishment for ditching out on work the previous day. Something pretty rare happened today, we received one tonne of rock salt. Seeing as we have no heavy machinery to move it I had newbie move a the entire tonne on his own by hand, each bag singularly. Brutal as that sounds it will be a lesson to him. It’s a lesson he needs to learn. It was inconsiderate as hell and he basically shat on all of us from my manager to his co-workers. If you shit on me you can expect to be shat upon from wuthering heights. Hopefully he’ll learn from his mistake. The reason he took the day isn’t important but the fact that he planned to take the day without giving my manager prior notice, which would enable him to arrange cover, is the real crime here.

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Also the golden boy, the other newbie has started to slip and is currently being shafted for it. This other newbie is not my responsibility and I’d be a liar if I said I didn’t enjoy watching him get shit for his mistakes. It isn’t all his fault my malice here stems from the fact that I told my supervisor it isn’t a good idea to let a newbie do important checks on stock and such, even if he is good at his job and almost half trained. So tomorrow we’re going to head back to work with cooler heads and I’m going to make sure my newbie doesn’t make the same mistakes again by educating him in the flaws of our location and part number systems and also the key differences between the parts he made the mistakes with. The other reason I enjoy watching the golden boy get shafted is that he speaks to me as if he knows, as if he’s senior to me. He thought it’d be clever to divide the orders into top and bottom floor which just doesn’t work… I told him, he didn’t listen and then he eventually realized I was correct. That system isn’t sustainable, not even on the busiest day.

You don’t have to like me, we don’t have to be friends, we’re not going to go out for beers together and I’m most certainly not adding you on Facebook or Xbox live or whatever. The two things I do require are respect and your ear because after all it’d be a good idea to listen to someone who’s spent longer in this hell hole than you have…
Misanthropist.