Archive for David Cameron

Scottish Independence.

Posted in England with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on September 11, 2014 by MISANTHROPIST

In a short time the Scottish people will be voting for their independence. That’s fair enough, I can see why they would want to be independent of the United Kingdom. They are under represented in parliament and some still cling onto our history in the same vein as those brits who go on about the empire we haven’t had for some time now. In our history we built a wall to keep them out and now they want out the PM wants them to stay. Funny how things change. I would say we are stronger as a United Kingdom but that’s up to the Scottish people. What really bothers me is that they’ve not really thought it through. First they wanted to hang on to our currency, of course they did. The pound sterling is one of the worlds oldest and strongest currencies. We didn’t make the same mistake as the United States by selling our gold reserves. Unfortunately for Scotland independence doesn’t work like that. Pissing and moaning about independence isn’t really valid if you want to keep our currency.

I have nothing against the Scots, I don’t even believe that one single poll on independence is an accurate representation of the opinions of the Scottish people and though it pains me to say it David ‘1984’ Cameron was correct in saying that the people shouldn’t vote yes just to give the Tories a kick in the balls. I also believe he was right in offering Scotland more powers of governance as they are not a region of England but a country as part of a union. The Scottish National Party would have the people believe that independence would be a smooth affair which is idiotic considering they wouldn’t have a currency. You could always do what Northern Ireland did with the Euro, see how that works out for you guys. The rebuttal was something to do with oil reserves off of Scotland, something about wealth from oil but seriously how long do you think that would last?

I’ve heard estimates ranging from 10-20 years and I don’t believe that’s enough time to build a strong independent nation who don’t need no England. I mean if it is what the Scottish people really want then so be it but their independence should include a good solid plan. We don’t want any drunk text messages when things go wrong in a decade’s time. Scottish independence would be a huge gamble, sure England might lose out in the short-term but if the shit hits the fan Scotland would be screwed. I’m actually annoyed by the whole thing, not Scotland wanting to be independent but how poorly planned the whole affair is on the part of the political parties pushing for a yes vote. They’re endangering the financial and economic well-being of the Scottish people whose interests are supposed to be paramount. Wait, what am I saying? We all know that’s not how politics really works…

There are other issues at play however such as families who are split between northern England and Scotland, if they were to go ahead and become independent then families would be separated. Then there’s the Scottish army regiments we would lose. I’ve met some of these people, yes I was going to join the army once. They are some of the funniest and most fearless fuckers I have ever met and it would be a shame to lose such an asset to our armed forces. I find myself hoping they don’t leave the United Kingdom but if they do it’s their choice. I hope the Scottish people won’t let the SNP fool them into thinking that independence would be smooth sailing. It won’t be.

I can’t believe I’m agreeing with David Cameron.
Gotta be better than Alex Salmond though.
God I need a drink.


Classy as F**k

Posted in Misanthropy, News with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 12, 2013 by MISANTHROPIST

It’s funny, you always see the real scumbags at either a Wedding or a Funeral. In this case it was a funeral. Nelson Mandela’s funeral to be exact. Before I begin I actually feel for his wife, she didn’t seem to be feeling the spirit at the celebration of his life and I don’t blame her. That funeral wasn’t about the man himself, for the international community it was about who could be seen there as evidenced by the classy selfies everyone was taking. If I took a selfie at a funeral I’d be removed from premises. Stay classy world leaders, I am actually pretty annoyed by this to say it politely. Since when has it been okay to take selfies at a funeral?

David ‘1984’ Cameron, Barack Obama and the Dutch PM who I could care less about are actually pretty disgusting. Note Michelle Obama’s face during this picture. I always took her as a miserable person and maybe a little jealous of her husband getting female attention but in this context I thought about it. I’m kinda hoping that the face she was making was one of disapproval toward her husbands idiotic behavior. If this wasn’t bad enough there’s the ‘translator’ for the deaf who was just making it up as he went along. That’s pretty sickening but I know that people aren’t above capitalizing on somebody’s death. The company disappeared shortly after questions were raised about the credibility of the translator.


Then there’s my favorite person. Bono. He made sure he was seen, next to George W Bush of all people. Loving that contrast, maybe that can be his next album cover. I hate that man with the burning fire of a thousand suns for reasons innumerable. As if all of this wasn’t bad enough Kanye tweeted some mindless crap about him being the Mandela of his generation. What a big-headed ass. If he accomplishes, in his lifetime, half of what Mandela attempted to accomplish then I’ll shut my mouth but we all know that isn’t going to happen. Kanye is right up there with Bono on my list.


I never though much of Michelle Obama but if I’m correct about what I said earlier then she may be one of the few decent people at this event. She could just be pissed about her husband’s ‘flirting’ but I hope I was right. Then again just because you want to believe the best about people doesn’t make it true. When did this become less about a man and his life’s work and more about exposure? It makes me sick. I’m not surprised by it at all but I do think it’s disrespectful as hell. I mean these are the people we idolize? Are we really making the right choice here? These people run our countries. Are you sure these are the right men and women for the job? And what does this say about us?

This funeral wasn’t about Mandela it was about being seen at Mandela’s funeral. Where’s the decency. If you want exposure Bono give your wealth to the third world you claim to care so much about and how about that second 747 you use just for your equipment? David Cameron has enough exposure for being an impotent and idiotic leader, Barack Obama is the President of the United States of America. I’m sure if he took a crap at a Wendy’s it’d be on the evening news. I remember something similar to this happening with a guy I knew. We were acquaintances, not friends and when he died lots of people attended his funeral. Some he didn’t even like.

I didn’t attend myself because I thought it would be disrespectful to pretend like we were close friends just because he had passed. I instead offered my condolences to his family and I frequently ask his mother how she’s doing. If I have the sense to know that attending the funeral for exposure like that and pretending you were close to a person somehow because they were dead is fucking disrespectful why can’t these people, the most powerful and influential men and women on earth. It’s just a scumbag thing to do. Then again I’m honest and that’s why I’m not in a position of power.

People make me sick.

David ‘1984’ Cameron.

Posted in England, Government/government bodies., Idiotic groups/people, Legal, Misanthropy, News, opression, People, Politics, rights, Social Media, Technology, The Internet., The Media with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 27, 2013 by MISANTHROPIST

Hello again readers, today I’m going to be writing about a special individual. Prime Minister of the United Kingdom: David Cameron. By all accounts a complete wanker. I once saw a wiki-leaks cable where the Central Intelligence Agency said something along the lines of  ‘An ineffective and indecisive leader.’ Good old CIA bang on, as per usual. If the NSA is reading this please pass a message onto the CIA for me? You didn’t have to spend all that money and use all that technology when I could have told you this after the first year of his reign as glorious overlord of the British government. Now usually this posh wanker is politically impotent and I really can’t say he’s done anything for anyone in his time as PM but his latest stunt would make Hitler, Stalin and Mao so proud.

You may remember my ‘dey turk our porn’ post from a while back, well this is the evolution of the bullshit we thought that we as a nation had put to rest. Cameron is redoubling his efforts and trying to pass the same law under the guise of tackling terrorism and extremism. For our safety! 1984 anyone?
This should be the last straw, dare I say that we were better off under Blair, I know I’m not voting for anything or anyone that supports censorship under the guise of protection. I will vote for anything or anyone that gets this idiot out of office. How is he even in office? He’s a posh wanker who is so out of touch with the realities of the common man that it isn’t even funny. Only under our current government could you be arrested for comments you made over the internet… We’re a country slowly being stripped of our freedoms.

scumbag cameron

I hear many people say write to your MP but is there really any point when they don’t address the question you’re asking, skirt around it and treat you like an idiot. If your local MP is conservative there’s no fucking point putting pen to paper because why would they concern themselves with opinions of the unwashed masses? Once they have your vote they cease to give a fuck about your opinion entirely. The next election cannot come around fast enough. I mean voting conservative is great if you’re middle class/upper class and have plenty of money but if you’re not either of those things you might as well grab the nearest phallic object and sodomize yourself with it repeatedly because that’s basically what you’re doing by voting for these  people.

A lot of people wonder why my generation are uninterested in politics and for the first time in my life I can say I understand it. What’s the point of playing a losing game? You vote for nationalists you get Nazis, you vote for conservatives you get the beginnings of a totalitarian regime, you vote for Liberal Democrats you get political impotence. Who is left to vote for that actually has a chance of winning. I wonder if the Monster Raving Looney Party are still on ballot papers?

Sorry, ranting a little bit there. No, I’m not sorry. I’m genuinely pissed off. They’re doing this because ‘hurr durr extremism’ but I’m pretty sure our nations security services were doing just fine dealing with it before someone had the bright idea to censor the last bastion of free press. This whole censorship idea is unnecessary and frankly disgusting. They are basically censoring contrary opinions and as nasty and as much as I disagree with them I will defend these assholes rights to express them. If we allow this then when does it stop? How far do these powers reach?
How long will it be before we cannot express our disdain against for our government before being thrown into work camps or re-education. Does it end before or after we live in a police state resembling George Orwell’s classic 1984?

Somebody send this idiot a copy of that book and make him read to see if he can draw the parallels that everyone else has. Back to what I was previously saying. If someone posts an extremist viewpoint on Reddit or 4chan then will big brother block these websites too? These powers are a little far-reaching for my liking, maybe they’ll even use these new powers to silence political opponents or who knows. All I know is that this cannot be allowed to happen for the sake of the freedom and my country. I hope that maybe the EU will step in a do something about this because in a word, this is just wrong. The quicker this Stalin wannabe is kicked out of office the better or I might end up in a gulag for this post.

I thought I saw a tear roll down Kim-Jong-Un’s cheek.

Ho Ho Fuckin’ Ho

Posted in America, Christmas, England, Misanthropy, People, Unpopular Opinions. with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 10, 2012 by MISANTHROPIST

It’s that time of year again, Christmas is fast approaching and someone at payroll thought it’d be an awesome idea to pay everyone on December 21st leaving everyone at the work place with about 3 days to do Christmas shopping. What does this mean for me?
It means that I’m going to be running around like a tit in a trance trying to secure a turkey and the various components of Christmas meal, not to mention the copious amounts of alcohol required to sit through bullshit Christmas TV that hasn’t changed a bit since I was 9 years old. To sum all this up I am not feeling festive at all.

grumpy-cat-christmas-card-memeIt will be a little different this year, one way is that I will be with my family which isn’t as bad as it sounds. The second thing is that we can finally confirm that my sister is not a lesbian as I have long suspected, (Not that I’d have any problem with that, it’s just that the large amount of lesbian jokes I’ve been saving are now useless) she is bringing her boyfriend over for dinner and a few drinks. I am thankful for one thing, Christmas for me doesn’t involve my extended family shitting on my life choices over cheap champagne. I am lucky to not have to deal with my extended family, they either hate us, don’t care or think they’re better than us which is laughable to me.

One thing that is going to suck is my SO being so far away. That will be the single worst thing about this Christmas, it will suck but I will have to grin and bear it. Back to the craziness, I have to somehow reserve a turkey. Get all the other ingredients and secure the alcoholic beverages all while paying the rent/taxes/bills/everything else because the local authority will give no quarter. They’d rather see us homeless than receive their money a little late. So that effectively cuts my four days into two or maybe even one making everything much harder than it needs to be. As everyone over the age of 18 knows, Christmas doesn’t just happen adults bust their asses to make this one day run smoothly so please if you walk into your parents bedroom and see them snorting Zoloft be understanding and supportive.

To make everything worse, in the biggest dick move possible, gas companies have upped their prices just before Christmas. To explain this before Americans get confused: When I say gas I refer to the gas that our stoves runs off and not the gas you put in your car. Anyway where I’m from gas is metered, you have a card and you put money on it and insert it into the meter which then allows you to heat your home until it runs out. With gas prices increased the money on your meter doesn’t last as long meaning you’re in the fucking cold if you don’t have money. It’s happened to us many times in the last month. All of this means that everyone is spending more on gas on top of extortionate rent rates and other fees leaving less for Christmas. Fuck British Gas. Seriously. Their actions are criminal.
It’s December 10th right now and I can’t wait for it to be over. For me, the magic of Christmas in long dead. The most magical it gets for me is that delirium I enter after that 5th drink and a few hours of over eating. The more time I spend in this country the more I hate it. It just feels as if the bank account is being fucked from all angles. By the government, the local government, Gas companies, Electric companies and whoever else can charge for whatever sub-par service they offer. Sure things could be worse but not by much. A lot needs to change in this country and it needs to change soon. I know this man isn’t the root cause but he is a major factor in the clusterfuck this country has become. This is why we can’t have nice things:
You may be wondering why David Cameron is drawn with an eye patch and bond villain beard holding a knife in a threatening ‘your money or your life’ type gesture. It’s because he is robbing us. I was never a huge fan of Tony Blair or Labour but dare I say it, we would have been better off under Labour. They did a lot wrong but they also did a lot right and they actually gave a fuck about the people who struggle to pay the rent and put food on the table. Nick Clegg has shown himself to be highly ineffective. I can see myself voting Labour in the next election. Hell I can see myself voting for anyone who can get this waste of space out of political office.

Santa is earning his glass of whiskey and bakewell tarts this year and Rudolph and co are going to need a heavy dose of SSRI’s for the PTSD that this year’s Christmas rush is going to produce. It’s a damn good thing we don’t get presents anymore or this whole thing would be even more difficult than it already is.

Peace on earth, Goodwill to all men and all of that idealistic bollocks.

P.S. I shit candy canes and festivity right now…