I actually forgot it was Father’s Day today. I haven’t seen the old man in over a year, not sure if he’s dead or alive. Don’t really care to know either, I hadn’t even thought about him until an old friend mentioned that I never speak about him. Of all people I didn’t expect that one to bring up my father.
It’s not that he was a bad person, just that I only knew him on a Sunday. He worked a lot and provided financially but emotionally he didn’t at all. I went to work with him a few times but other than that all we had in common was fishing and the odd camping trip. So me and my father were not close. I don’t resent him for leaving home, even if it was shitty and right before my 15th birthday.
I will say one thing, the mans mistakes probably led to me being a better father when I have my own hell spawn. So yeah this is a normal day for me and many other people. I was lucky enough to have known my old man at least. The constant ‘share if you love your dad’ and other Father’s Day Facebook spam gets a bit irritating after a while.
I was raised by a single parent from aged 15 upwards. Growing up in a house full of women really gears a man up for the future. I have no excuse for making simple man-stakes. I think it did help my future relationships in the way that I’ve already seen and know how to handle girl stuff. By that I mean periods, actually listening when she talks and the body image stuff. After knowing all of the shit that women go through I have never felt luckier to bat for the danglers. We have it pretty easy.
I don’t ever remember my father telling me what it is to be a man. I found that out on my own. Just like shaving, I remember the cuts to this day lol. When a 15 year old boy hears his mother crying alone at night he grows up fast. He either continues to be a selfish child or he becomes a man fast because he never wants to hear or see her suffer like that again. Even to this day I still hate seeing a woman cry.
I don’t resent my father at all. I harbour no hatred for him or any kind of Ill-will. It’d be a waste of my time. I just haven’t forgotten and I doubt I ever will. The best and probably only advice he ever have me was this:
‘When your mother is angry, listen, agree and then leave her alone for a few hours and she’ll be fine.’
I’ll give him that, it really does work. I wouldn’t say he was a bad man but at the same time I wouldn’t say he was a good one either. I actually wouldn’t mind going for a beer with him one day, if I could find him. Then again it isn’t like he doesn’t know my number and our residence hasn’t changed so that’s on him.
Last I was aware he had married. My step brother and sisters are a real piece of work. I am unfortunate enough to know them. He never did marry my mother. That’s a damn shame really because though he would have still left us in debt, the state would have ensured my mother got half and her life would have been much easier. It’s harder to claim you’re bankrupt when everything is on paper.
Know any bankrupt individuals who own a boat? I didn’t think so… I’m not upset at all or anything like that. I just thought this might make for a good topic to post something.
Happy Father’s Day people. Or happy ‘whomever it was that took the time to raise you’ day.