The things you come to miss.

There’s nothing quite like the feeling of an empty bed. You get really used to sharing a bed. Be it your S.O stealing the damn covers on a cold night, their snoring, having their head on your chest or just the sound of their breathing which can be oddly comforting in itself. I miss that smile, the way she smiled the first time I brought her coffee in the morning. Simple things. Apparently nobody had ever done that before, me, I thought that was normal relationship stuff. One thing I really miss is the eggs she’d make in the morning. I don’t know if it’s the method or the fact that the eggs are organic but damn she makes good breakfast.

It seems I did well on the family test, her mother likes me and says that she’s never been so happy. No arguments like with past boyfriends etc. Her father seems happy with her decision and shows his gratitude by feeding me a lot and offering me expensive alcohol. Usually to the tune of ‘Eh, Gringo! Cerveja?’ Her grandmother seems to really love me, and in a Jewish family she’s basically the boss so that counts for a lot. I seem to be approved of which is always nice. Not that it mattered much but I’m glad they like me, makes things smoother. I’ve actually come to miss them a lot, I grew quite attached to them and they treated me like one of their own.

You start to get used to the finer points of being in a relationship. Going out together, waking up with her and falling asleep with her head on your chest and then it’s gone again for some time. You begin to appreciate it even more so after the fact. I have her asleep right now on skype and for a moment it feels normal but it’ll be a little while before I can enjoy the small things again. Not only am I missing her but also the pace of life in Brazil, everything is easy-going with no real set time. They don’t really rush and I like that. I could easily see myself living there.

I guess I miss her, probably why I still haven’t washed the lipstick stains off the collar my coat.
-Misanthropist.

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