Misanthrope’s Survival Guide: Introduction/Technology and you.


If you’re wondering why I wrote this then your guess is as good as mine. There are many people I know who are always complaining about not being able to get a moment alone, a respite from people and their bullshit. A break from all the general day-to-day shit that the world has to offer us. I do, however, know who I am writing this for. The hardcore misanthrope, the introvert or those of you who just can’t seem to get a moment alone like my partner. We all have busy lives but for some it is beyond necessary that we are able to take a break from people and spend some time alone without being bothered.

The single biggest problem is that the thing you’re complaining about can be easily fixed. The fix is quick and painless and it starts here with one single hand-held device that has revolutionised how we interact with and contact others. Your cell phone allows people to contact you any time and any place as long as it is on. With new technology on the rise your cellphone is now connected to most forms of social media meaning you’re available to anyone 24/7.  There is one fast fix here but to most people your cellphone is your lifeline and it isn’t possible to turn it off for an amount of time without some negative consequences, I pity you but to those of you reading I offer this solution.

The first thing you need to do is set it to silent for a while, the second is sign out of all social media or at least appear offline. Another life saver is text messaging. This means you don’t have extended contact with someone, which can be a godsend if you didn’t want to talk to the person in the first place and you’re too much of a wuss to tell them. It’s useful for other things such as lying to your boss. Remember messages, only ever call someone you want to talk to, if it’s important or as a last resort. A final point about text messaging is that you remain in control of the conversation at all times, that is very useful in a number of situations.

If you only text message on your phone and rarely appear online on social media you’ll find that you are left alone after a while more often than not. So we’ve covered turning your phone on silent, appearing offline or signing out and text messaging rather than calling. One thing I did forget is Blackberry Messenger, this is a pretty useful service available to all the unfortunate people who own blackberries and aren’t paying through the nose for music and apps in the apple store. I really don’t know if there is an appear offline mode, all i know is that people can see if you’ve read their messages which further complicates things when you’re ignoring someone or just looking for some breathing space. Either way the ultimate solution is this: Don’t pay for the service. BBM isn’t free, its ‘free’ and this service that you pay for is the same as another you’re already paying for. Pay for one or the other damn it, why have something you don’t need?

Now we have your cell phones out the way here is another important announcement about technology and the internet. Remember you’re never quite as anonymous as you think you are. If you don’t already know this, you should have a separate work and personal email. This isn’t only essential to maintain you privacy, it’s also to maintain your life in general. That said don’t give out your email, messenger or BBM to anyone who isn’t necessary. This cuts down on your contacts list, saves memory and frees up the above communication methods for things that are important/emergencies. It also means people will be able to bother you less.

Another side note about work. Whatever you do, do not give out your phone number to colleagues because they’ll call asking you favors like if you’d take their shift or your boss will call saying they want you in today. It will be the single worst mistake you ever make. People from work whom you’d never give your number to will acquire it from somebody else. It will be a fucking nightmare.

Section Summary:
Cellphones should be turned off at night to avoid assholes waking you up in the early AM.

If you cannot turn  your cell off switch it to vibrate/silent.

Send text messages instead of calls.

If you have a Landline you might want to put that on silent too or just pull the cord out if you’re feeling daring today.

Don’t give out your BBM/Messenger address/phone number out unless absolutely necessary.

Never give your number out to anyone from work.

You’ll find that if you try these methods you will be able to get a moment’s peace and you will be less stressed out in general. There’s nothing worse than some idiot from Facebook annoying you while you’re at work. If you can help it though you should really avoid social media in general or keep its usage to a bare minimum. Facebook sucks anyways. I’m still not comfortable with people being able to contact me that easily. 90% of the problem for the people who complain about not being able to get a moment’s peace is that they are constantly glued to their damn phones. It’s like an addiction and it’s pretty bad when you’re messaging someone in the next room to bring you something. You know who you are!

I hope you’ve enjoyed part one.
Misanthropist.

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